Entrance music: Angels by Robbie Williams 


Good afternoon everyone and a very warm welcome. My name is Natasha and I’m an independent celebrant and it’s my privilege to be leading the service today as we come together to honour and celebrate the life of a clearly loved man Neil Hedworth.  


Neil was a loving and devoted partner to Lesley, a proud dad to Clare and Ben, an adored grandad to Esmé Lara and Adelyn Elise, a cherished brother to Stephen and Carolyn and a much loved father in law to Rich.  Neil will not only be missed by those mentioned, but also by his brothers in law Brian and Andrew, his sister in law Lauran, mother in law Jo, Ben’s partner Sarah, his good friends Garry, Walter and Phil and his beloved Waterloo Crew as well as his many other friends, colleagues and acquaintances.


Although I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting Neil his partner Lesley and his daughter Clare have both kindly shared a few stories with me which we hope can be a celebration of Neil’s life.  Today’s ceremony is going to be made up of these memories and reflections from Neil’s loved ones who described him as a very laid back man who was very lenient with people, he would give anyone his last, he was loved by everyone who knew him, he was a gentle giant with a heart of gold.  


Of course, nothing can take away the sadness of today. I know that for now it must be so hard to think about Neil without having feelings of grief and loss but I hope by joining together today and reflecting on his life we can also smile, celebrate his life and remember Neil with fond memories as we honour the unique footprint he leaves on our world. 


So, when did life begin for Neil?


He came into the world in Dunston on Monday the 5th of October 1959 as one of 3 children to his parents Sydney and Margerite.  Neil had joined his older brother Stephen and a few years later his little sister Carolyn was born, completing their family. 


The family initially grew up in Dunston where Stephen recalls a time when he and Neil were playing tarzan using the curtains to swing on and everything falling down upon them. Then at the age of ten Neil and his family moved to Wickham, where they remained for around four years before moving to Allenheads at the age of 14. It was here that Carolyn recalls herself and her two older brothers exploring the abandoned mines together, looking back now she realises how dangerous that actually was, however enjoyable it had been at the time. 


Neil’s parents had a caravan at Gilcrux which is where his dad took him for his first pint at the local pub when he was about 14.  It would be unheard of now but a bobby walked through the pub door, he saw Neil underage drinking and when he questioned it his dad said, “it’s ok he’s with me” and the bobby left them to enjoy their pint. 


During their time at Allenheads, Neil attended Hexham Grammar school, where he was a keen athlete, playing both football and rugby. He went on to play football for The Robbs of Hexham team named the Hexham Wanderers, alongside his good friend Walter.  Neil was also part of a very successful rugby team for his school.  They were undefeated for a full year so Neil and his team mates all went out to celebrate at the local pub.  They were all under age and most of the lads got thrown out of the pub, however, Neil and one of his mates sat to one side, drinking quietly, while their mates were outside watching them and giving them 2 fingers!


I’m sure his siblings won’t forget the time when they all decided to throw a party when their mam and dad went away for a weekend.  The house got trashed so it’s little wonder why they ran away when their parents turned up in the middle of the party!


Neil went on to work with his good friend Walter, first on a joint venture, at their own carpet and furniture shop on market Street in Hexham, then at Dickensons Carpet shop, the carpet discount warehouse.  Neil’s longest career was in the carpet trade but it was the pub trade he loved and was very passionate about; over the years he has ran and managed many successful pubs. 


At the age of 19, Neil met Jill Anderson working in Robbs of Hexham. They dated for several years before marrying in the September of 1983.  Five years later their daughter Clare was born on the 20th of January 1988, giving Neil the daughter he'd always wanted. Two years later on 26th of March 1990 their son Ben Joseph was born completing their family. Neil and Jill raised their family in the town of Hexham, where Clare and Ben both fondly recall visiting their Dad and Walter at work and playing hide and seek and other fun games together in the vast carpet shop.


The family often went on holiday in the Lake District, visiting Neil's parents, Syd and Margerite.  It has to be said, over the years of visiting his parents Neil always took the scenic route, he didn’t like motorways and much preferred the windey roads which gave his left foot something to do!  Neil enjoyed climbing the mountains with his parents and son, Ben, including the 3rd tallest Mountain in England, Helvellyn, Ben being only seven the first time they climbed it together.  


The next adventure for Neil and Jill was taking over the 'The heart of all England' pub, in Hexham, where he was landlord for several years, making many friends along the way.  It was during this time when the family had their beloved dog Jet who had always been under strict instructions not to go upstairs in the family home so you can imagine Jet’s confusion when they moved into the pub and Jet was then told he wasn’t allowed to go down the stairs! On the subject of Jet.  Like father like son, one night Neil came home to find the house invaded by teenagers having a party and he was worried that Jet couldn't stand up.  He discovered that they'd got the dog drunk giving him beer in his bowl instead of water!! Poor Jet had a bad hangover the next day. 


Before leaving the pub, Jill and Neil decided to part ways and it was then that he met his partner, Lesley.  Neil did a lot of fell walking in his earlier years so he thought it would be a good idea, on his and Lesley’s first official date, to take her on a walk with him.  Little did he know though that Lesley was going to turn up in a short skirt and high heels so after getting stuck in the mud many times, in the end they found a pub!


Neil and Lesley left Hexham and together they moved around the country, working in many places from Primrose Valley Caravan park to Subway.  While working at Primrose valley they laughed over the fact that Lesley had to translate to most of the staff there who couldn't understand Neil’s accent even though it wasn't a broad geordie accent.  


Whilst living in their flat in Filey it was always a standing joke between Neil and Lesley  how many steps it was to the bar, it was actually 158!  The said bar is where they both met the famous Jackie Charlton who they enjoyed a sports quiz with that night.  Lesley said, “it has to be said, “Jackie is shit at sports questions.”


Whilst working at Subway Neil and Lesley lived in South Shields together, a house Lesley won’t forget in a hurry!  She allowed her dad to view the house before they accepted it, not realising that their dream, big bathroom had mirrors around the whole bottom half of the wall, a little off putting when using the loo!


Thankfully their time there was short lived and they soon found themselves living in a beautiful 2 bedroom apartment, aptly named ‘The bar’ on Times Square in Newcastle.  


Neil never forgot how much he loved the pub trade and eventually, Lesley and Neil found themselves in Jarrow, running 'the Royal oak'.   Rather than being 158 steps to the bar it was now only 14, from upstairs to downstairs! During this time Neil's daughter, Clare married her husband Rich Coles, a day which Neil was so proud of when he gave Clare away.  Clare and Rich went on to have their beautiful baby girl, Esmé Lara on the 27th of August 2013, making Neil a proud Grandad. 


After the pub in Jarrow, Neil and Lesley moved to Framwell Gate Moor in Durham and took over 'The Marquis of Granby.  During this time Neil was blessed with another Grandaughter, Clare's 2nd daughter, Adelyn Elise born on the 3rd of February 2017. 


Neil and Lesley’s most recent adventure started when they took over 'The Waterloo' in Blyth, Neil’s favourite pub to date and his final resting place. Over his years at the Waterloo, Neil has made many friends, he was loved by all of the staff and regulars that frequent the pub including his good friend, Phil who Neil grew close with during his time in Blyth. It is also the place where Neil's son, Ben met his partner, Sarah, whom Neil was very fond of. It has to be said, whichever pub Neil has managed, his son Ben always followed which meant Neil got to see him a lot and they were always very close. 


I’m sure you will all agree, whenever Neil and Lesley took on a pub they gave it their everything and went all out to keep their punters happy. They held many events at their pub including fancy dress, although the staff hated having to wear the tu tu’s but one night Neil showed his funny side when he wore 2 - one on his top and one on his bottom!  Mind Neil wasn’t too keen on having to wear tights when he was dressed as Robin Hood for another fancy dress night. They also held many event days for the armed forces which came with a mess tent, sand bags, army netting the lot.  Neil even went as far as wanting a tank on the driveway, a wish he got when their friend Louise turned up with a tank, a mini tank which is shown in Neil’s hand on the picture here.  Louise did remind Neil that he didn’t specify the size of the tank!   Neil also did the buffet every Sunday for Waterloo Blyth FC, a gesture which didn’t go unnoticed.  After Neil’s passing they all did a minute silence for Neil which is something Lesley is eternally grateful for.  And who can forget Neil’s famous half time hot dogs which he put out for every televised newcastle and England game.  Neil hated doing them to begin with but that was just him, he did things to please people and he did it because everyone loved them and in the end even he missed them when he wasn't allowed to put them out during covid restrictions. Thankfully he managed to get 1 final hot dog before he left us. 


Other than the Waterloo, Neil’s favourite pub had to be the Blue Bucket, Lauran and Andrew’s garden pub, despite it being full of Leeds memorabilia!  The pub had no restrictions, you were expected to get drunk and Neil was served his favourite food, namely a takeaway!  Lauran had always wanted an ice machine to complete the bar so you can imagine how happy she was when Neil and Lesley bought her an ice machine for a joint Christmas and birthday present.  All they could hear when Lauran first used it was, “it’s made ice, it’s made ice.”  Whilst on the subject of Lauran and Andrew, it would be appropriate to mention that Neil volunteered to take the video of their wedding rather than appear in it because he didn't like having his picture taken!


Aside from them working together for many years Neil and Lesley made a great team at home too.  Lesley admits she’s not the tidiest of people in the home with her focus being on the pub and she isn’t so great at cooking either so Neil would do the cooking and cleaning and Lesley would do the laundry which was just as well because Neil was notorious for hanging clothes back up, dirty or not! She never could get him to use the laundry basket. 


Whilst doing his cleaning Neil would always take any half toilet rolls upstairs so he could keep the full ones in the pub.  Whenever they were finished with Neil used to use the card board inserts to create his toilet roll tower!  Whenever Lesley made a suggestion to throw them away he would say, “no it’s art work!”  When he finally did get rid of it the staff became so used to seeing it they started another one up again. 


Cooking wise, it’s understandable why Neil did most of the cooking.  He was a bit of a romantic at heart and often wrote messages with Lesley’s food, one of the more memorable ones being ‘I love you’ made out of cheese on a salad.  Lesley once attempted to make a meal for them which consisted of quiche, Chips and salad.  Lesley set all of the table nicely and she even added a rose for a romantic gesture.  When they sat down to eat it the quiche was stone cold!  Lesley didn’t realise the quiche needed cooked in the oven first!  Needless to say, they ended up getting a takeaway!


I’m sure you will all agree, Neil was awful with dates and times, he rarely remembered birthdays and he usually only knew it was Christmas time when the decorations went up!  Lesley said he would often do his Christmas shopping on Christmas Eve.  


Neil once did attempt something romantic for Valentine’s Day when he made Lesley breakfast in bed complete with a single rose and a card which read ‘happy valentines darling’.  Lesley was happy he had made the effort but she had to tell him that Valentine’s Day was a week away!  When the day did come round Neil had forgotten!


After being together for so long it was often difficult for Lesley to know what to get Neil for his birthday but she managed to pull some great presents off for him.  She once bought him a driving experience in York where he got to drive a Ferrari, an Aston Martin and a Lamborghini.  Neil said nothing could ever top that unless Lesley got him in a tank so, as I’m sure you would have guessed, Lesley arranged for Neil’s Christmas present for him and Ben to do a tank driving experience.  The boys both loved it but Neil said, you won’t top that one unless you get me a plane”.  Instead with a lot of help from Ben she bought him a car!  She organised a treasure hunt around the pub and the treasure at the end was the key to the car and the V5 document followed by the car. Neil loved that car, it was his pride and joy although that didn’t stop him from never cleaning her!  Mind, the car did cause some embarrassment 
when Ben took it away to fix it and his work mates found something they shouldn't have in the glove compartment!


As we all may know, Neil and Lesley were managing different pubs for over a year during lockdown but were constantly in touch and visited each other as often as possible but as mentioned earlier, Neil spent a lot of this time with his good friend Phil.  It seemed as though whenever Lesley called, Phil was there with Neil sharing a can or seven while they quietly put the world to right!  Phil had been meaning to sort out Neil’s damaged wheel arch on his car for some time during lockdown which didn’t get done, despite constant reminders from Lesley. Personally she believes they were too busy watching babe Station so It was only when the Covid restrictions were starting to be lifted and Neil and Lesley booked a mid week break away that the wheel arch was finally done!  Neil was so happy to show off his repaired car as Phil had gone the extra mile and fixed both sides and both Phil and Lesley were happy that she could stop nagging him now!


After all the time away from each other Neil and Lesley realised they couldn't spend any longer apart and decided to leave their respective pubs and look into a new venture together. This was supposed to happen on 23rd August. 


A leaving party was arranged for Neil which, sadly, was not to be.  Neil passed away suddenly on the 19th of August.  What should have been his leaving party turned into a balloon release in memory of Neil.  He is now resting in his brand new Newcastle away shirt given to him by his staff and friends at the Waterloo. A shirt he hinted enough for when he knew people were collecting for his leaving present.  He will also be sent off in his infamous black cargo pants which people always nagged him to wash and his huge Homer Simpson slippers.



Neil will soon be reunited with his beloved dad Syd. His son Ben will be arranging in the near future to scatter his dad and grandads ashes on Helvellyn, a place which was very close all of their hearts.


Neil has obviously been dearly loved and I could share so many more stories of his life here today but instead I'm going to let his beloved Waterloo Crew share them with you later this afternoon and I would like to ask you all now to take a few minutes to think of your own special memories of Neil and reflect on these in your own personal way.  For those who are religious you may use this time for your own private prayers. Whilst we do this we will listen to a song.


Remembrance Music: Local hero (shortened version) by Mark Knopfler 


DURING THIS TIME IF YOU COULD ALL STAND AND PLACE YOUR ROSES ON NEIL’S COFFIN


We have now reached the moment where we are going to say our formal farewells to Neil. As a mark of respect, would those who feel able, please stand with me.


Audience stand


In sadness for his death but in gratitude for his life, we will be remembering Neil Hedworth for the love and laughter, the warmth and sunshine he brought to our world. As we part from his physical presence, there is comfort in knowing that he is now at peace, beyond harm, fear or pain and now, as we hold Neil in our hearts and minds we commit his body to its natural ending.


CURTAIN CLOSURE


Please be seated


On behalf of the family I would like to thank you all for joining with us today. I’m sure Neil would be so proud to see how his family and friends are all supporting each other at this very difficult time.


It is times like this we realise just how precious and fleeting life can be so, let us look at our loved ones today with a fresh awareness of how lucky we are to have them and live our own lives to the full.  


Thanks from Lesley must go to the following people:


To Stephen from Blyth Family Funerals for all of his help, care and professional approach to all manners of this service.  


To all family and friends, particularly to Clare and Ben for being part of Neil’s life and for their continued strength since his passing.  


To the Waterloo crew for always being there for Neil and ensuring there was always enough food around for him to steal. 


To Josephine and Lorraine for the food  provided for the wake. 


The family would like to invite you all back now to the Waterlooo pub where you can all keep the stories of Neil flowing and remember a very special man. 


To send you on your way we will listen to a final song which is special to Neil and Lesley.